While dating, many often turn to their friends for advice. While there is nothing wrong with asking your best friend for advice, it might not always be the best idea to seek advice about dating issues from that friend.
Based on research, there are two types of friends that may not provide the best advice – guy friends and friends already in established relationships.
Researchers for the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology measured the relationship status of 74 couples and gathered information from interviews with their friends about whether or not the friends thought they would still be dating in 6 months.
The friends of the female relationship partner or friends of both partners were reliable in predicting the couple’s future status. The friends of just the male partner, however, were not typically good predictors. Based on this research, it is probably not a good idea to seek for early dating advice from your guy friends if you are male.
Also, according to an article in Psychology Today, friends who are in long-term relationships themselves are not good at understanding how other “couples” truly feel about each other. In a research study by an Oregon State University psychologist, college students watched a video of 45 couples and were then asked their thoughts on how in love the partners were with each other.
It turns out that the college students that were in relationships or married were not effective at predicting how other couples felt about each other, even though those college students thought they were making accurate predictions.
When examining the reasons behind this, the psychologist heading the research, Frank Bernieri, believed that it is because those in strong relationships develop certain ideas about what love is and how it should be expressed and are blinded to other ways of expressing love.
Remember, every relationship is different. Just because your friend thinks he or she knows about love, doesn’t mean they know what works for you.
Only you know the true and complete story of your relationship, but if you need to ask a friend, maybe a single female friend that knows your relationship well would be the best choice.
Trust your instinct and keep your friends as a source of support and comfort, don’t look to them to be relationship experts.